Archive for March, 2012

I’ve just started reading The Beck Diet Solution Weight Loss Workbook which isn’t actually a diet plan but a self help book about using the principles of Cognitive Behavioural Therapy to successfully lose weight and then maintain a healthy weight. The reason for this is that I, like many, many other weight watchers, have done this whole diet malarkey before. I lost a good couple of stone before I got married and felt brilliant, but it was probably only two or three months before I started regaining the weight. I think the problem was that at my healthy weight I felt so great that I stopped thinking it was important to be careful, and very quickly picked up old and new bad habits. That, plus the stress of moving jobs and having a miscarriage took me in 3 short years to the start of this blog and obesity. I’m very aware this time round that I need to permanently change my way of thinking about food. I don’t want to obsess, and I don’t want to be on a diet for the rest of my life, but I do want to be mindful of what is and isn’t healthy and I do want to keep a certain moderation about my eating habits-forever. This might sound a bit miserable but I’m really not saying I’m never going to eat cake again, just that in a year, or five years, or twenty years, I want to be able to enjoy a slice of cake or a glass of wine and then stop there. I don’t want to go back to eating mindlessly and I don’t want to go back to treating my body like crap. I also don’t want DD to ever see me on a diet, which is why it’s so important for me to get my head around all this before she becomes aware of such things as body image.

One of the first things the Beck Diet Solution asks you to do is make a list of all the reasons you want to be slim and healthy, so I thought I’d share my list here. Some of these reasons are suggestions in the book and some are my own.

Here goes…

I’ll look better and be more attractive to DH.
I’ll have more confidence.
I’ll be able to wear clothes I like.
I’ll be able to buy new underwear!
I’ll feel happier when I look in the mirror.
I’ll feel happier in a swimming costume.
I’ll get more compliments. (Not proud of this one.)
I’ll be less at risk of developing Type 2 Diabetes.
I’ll feel better physically.
I’ll have more stamina.
I’ll have more energy.
I’ll make a better first impression on people.
I’ll be able to keep up with DD as she gets more active.
I’ll be less inhibited about my body.
I’ll feel in control.
I’ll feel as if I’ve achieved something important.
I’ll set a good example for DD.
I’ll help my whole family be more healthy.
DH will be proud of me.
I’ll be proud of myself.

I was a bit shocked at myself initially as lots of the reasons are to do with how I look, and I don’t like to think I’m that vain, but you know what, I actuallyamquite vain! Plus the looks are important because I want DD to only ever have a normal, healthy example in me. Some of the reasons make me a bit sad, as I didn’t really realise that my confidence and sense of achievement are affected so much by how I look. I like to think of myself as a pretty ballsy, outspoken, sensible sort of person but I spend more time than I’d like to admit feeling quite crap about myself, and then projecting that onto other people and assuming they think I look crap too. (Which they may or may not do I suppose.) I have friends of all shapes and sizes and tend to think they’re all gorgeous but I am far more harsh on myself. I’m hoping that as I gain confidence in my ability to maintain a healthy weight I’ll also gain confidence in myself in general.

I’ve read stuff about CBT before and thought it was all pretty obvious, but I’m really going to work hard and do all the exercises the book asks of me, and take off my cynical hat. I think you have to be pretty honest with yourself in order for any kind of therapy like this to work, whether it’s on the psychiatrist’s couch or just on your own couch with a book, and in the past I’ve not really been at a stage where I wanted to be totally honest or insightful. I’ll update as I go through, and of course I’m carrying on with WW alongside it.


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I read this on Sleeping Bootay’s blog and thought it was fun. If you do it too leave a comment with a link to yours!

1) What product makes you feel a million dollars?

Bobbi Brown corrector and concealer, without a doubt. These are two little pots of magic which make my dark circles practically disappear and therefore make me look normal and not quite as zombie-like as I am in my natural state. I discovered them in 2008 and since then have not bought another concealer; I doubt I will ever defect from these!

2) What’s your skin care secret/a passed down tip?

My Mum always told me to use gentle products as she and I both have sensitive skin. I partly credit that little nugget of advice, received as a teenager, with my good skin now; I never used the super strong products aimed at teenage skin when I started playing about with make up/skin care and I think it made a big difference in keeping my skin clear rather than reacting to harsh products. Liz Earle products are the best for my skin and so gentle.


I wish I had also listened to my mum when she told me not to pluck my eyebrows though!

3) What’s your hair care secret?

Buy a Babyliss Big Hair. It has totally transformed my frizzy, messy barnet into wavy, shiny, normal person’s hair. (No BB concealer+no BBH=living dead.)


4) What’s your biggest diet rule?

Don’t ‘diet’ unless it’s absolutely necessary. Eat healthily by all means but don’t actually ‘go on a diet’ when you’re a size 10, 15 years old and annoyed you can’t borrow your friend’s size 8 jeans. You will start a lifelong yo-yo habit that will wreak havoc on your metabolism and result in you weighing a stone more at 30 than is healthy. Seriously. Unless you are actually overweight according to your doctor and given a plan to follow by him/her it is not necessary. Just eat a balanced diet with plenty of protein, fruit, veg, carbs, a bit of fat and play some netball or hockey or something!

5) Any workout tips?

The 30 Day Shred is amazing! It’s usually on Amazon for about a fiver.

6) What’s your perfume secret weapon?

Chanel No 19 Poudre is my latest obsession, though I tend to have about 20 perfumes on the go at once.


7) Which item of clothing always turns heads?

Erm, I have no idea whether they turn heads but my Gap high waisted skinny jeans make me feel good so hopefully they look good too!

8) What’s your most treasured piece of jewellery?

My engagement and wedding rings. The wedding ring was made to fit around the diamond in my engagement ring so they sit perfectly together. I love them. My husband picked the engagement ring and got it absolutely right-a simple but stunning solitaire. I could get very soppy here so I’ll stop!


9) Who’s your style crush?

This is a hard one…there’s lots of people I think dress amazingly (though they don’t necessarily influence how I dress myself). Tilda Swinton, Monica Belluci, Kate Moss, Rachel Weisz…I also love Naomi from 90210 which is a bit embarrassing!


10) Tell us something we don’t know about you.

There is something of the primary school geek about me and I still love all the things I did then-knitting, writing stories, reading poetry, dressing up etc…

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Today a friend and I went to Leeds to go to Harvey Nichols and do an almighty make up shop. And it was. ALMIGHTY.





The eyeshadows pic is a bit misleading as it’s actually only the 6 in the palette by themselves plus Carbon (the matte black) that are new, but I thought they looked so pretty all together I couldn’t resist taking the photo like that.

Harvey Nicks had a deal on where if you spent over £110 you got a free goody bag and the lovely ladies at MAC gave me two of them as I spent such a hideous amount of money. There’s some great stuff in there. From left to right-Butter London nail varnish, Chloe perfume, Bare Minerals lip gloss, Trish McEvoy eye base, YSL Shocking mascara, Laura Mercier radiance primer, Shu Uemera skin purifier, Bliss body butter (love this), Lancôme Visionnaire, Espa moisturiser, Clarins HydraQuench serum, Elemis hand and nail cream and Eve Lom cleanser and muslins. Phew! The samples are all pretty generous sizes too, particularly the Bliss body butter and the Clarins serum, and the nail varnishes are full size which is brilliant as I love Butter London.

From MAC I got 6 Select Cover concealers, Groundwork paint pot, 7 eyeshadows (although annoyingly one of the ones I asked for, Omega, wasn’t in there as the SA accidentally gave me a different one), a 217 brush, Subculture lipliner, medium dark Mineralise Skin Finish Natural and 6 pigments (smaller, stackable ones which are very handy). Then in Illamasqua they had a brilliant sale so I got the cream eyeshadows for £5 each! Plus the sealing gel and Liquid Metal in Surge which is amazing stuff and I can’t wait to use. In Armani I got the Luminous Silk foundation to replace my trusty Bobbi Brown which has sadly gone off-which I guess shows how rarely I wear it! The SA also gave me a tester of serum and mascara to add to my goodies stash which was lovely. I also got a couple of bags from Muji (which is closing in Leeds sadly) which will come in very handy.

The SA in Illamasqua was a beautiful transsexual-I’d have killed for her bone structure! She looked amazing. Apparently she was stopped on the street and asked whether she wanted to work for them-I wish someone would do that to me! (Someone has told me since reading this that she was Drew from the Channel 4 program ‘My Transsexual Summer’ so now I feel a bit like I’ve met a celebrity, even though I’ve never seen the program so obviously didn’t recognise her.)

So anyway, please pray to the beauty gods that I start to make some money out of make up soon…and in the meantime I will definitely NOT be buying any more make up. For at least a year. Or at least a month…

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Yesterday was a lovely day: DD was christened and we had about 40 friends and family up for the occasion. The service was great and a little bit emotional. We had two hymns from our wedding, Love Divine and Tell Out My Soul, DD wore the christening gown that I wore almost 30 years ago (and that I think had been made by either my great or great great grandmother), DD was beautifully behaved and flirted shamelessly with the vicar throughout the actual baptism and our parents and step parents managed to all be in the same room at the lunch afterwards without killing each other, which was a massive relief and first!

We had a gorgeous chocolate cake made by Betty’s, the famous Yorkshire tea shop, which came complete with a rattle made of icing that actually rattled! It was brilliant and very, very rich so I didn’t feel at all deprived just having a small piece.

To top the day off and make it even better, one of the coven announced her pregnancy which is pretty much the most exciting thing to happen this year! It was lovely to catch up with friends but I was sad I only got to talk to them for a few minutes each as there were so many people there. I am resolved to pick up the phone and call them more often-I’m rubbish at it. One of my closest friends called me from Australia last week and I missed the call which I was gutted about-but I still haven’t had a chance to call her back which is appalling 😦

Weigh in is tomorrow and I’m hoping our buffet and cake from yesterday won’t have an adverse effect on the scales. I was sensible so fingers crossed!

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Goal! Well, it’s a bit of a cheat really. I decided in the end to put 10st 7lbs as my official WW goal so I could stop paying for it, but in reality my goal is still 10st. So as far as WW are concerned, I’m there, but in my heart I still have half a stone to go. Still, it was quite nice to get my Gold membership certificate at my meeting this morning.

DD is getting christened this Sunday and I’m not sure what to wear. For ages this has been the case because I didn’t fit into anything but now it’s the case because I fit into all my old clothes and have too much choice! I’m quite looking forward to having a big trying on session. The next big thing happening is my best friend’s wedding this summer, but I’m definitely not wearing something old for that-I’m getting to 10st and buying something fabulous!

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I just bought a couple of the new YSL Glossy Stains and had to post immediately as they are marvellous! I got 7, which is a lovely, soft, muted coral and 9, a fabulous true red.

They’re in a category of their own really as they’re lipstick, gloss and stain all at once. You could argue that MaxFactor Lipfinity is the same concept but I’d disagree, mainly because I think Lipfinity are horribly uncomfortable on the lips, very drying, and don’t stain so much as gradually flake off in the middle. The YSL offering also doesn’t have a separate gloss stick; the gloss is in the product itself.

They go on beautifully and do feel a bit sticky but in a far less obtrusive way than a traditional gloss such as a Lancome Juicy Tube. You can build up the layers depending on the desired intensity and the glossy result lasts for a good few hours. I put this on at 4.30pm and it’s now 6.45pm:



(Excuse the shoddy pictures.) You can see the colour and gloss are still in full swing after over two hours, a cup of tea and a lot of talking. (Everybody who knows me knows I do talk a lot!) In order to get the same effect after eating you would need to reapply, however, the genius is that these stain your lips evenly and thoroughly, so when it does wear off you still have a considerable whack of colour. I reckon they’re absolutely perfect for brides as a result.

There are about 20 colours, from the very dark to the very light and they’re selling out pretty fast from what I can see. At over £20 a pop they’re not cheap but I can see them becoming my go to lipstick for long lasting colour. I already want a couple more…

UPDATE: I’ve now eaten supper, it’s 9.30pm and I’ve still got perfectly applied lipstick! I’m quite amazed. The gloss effect has worn off to some extent but all the colour is still there. I’m definitely getting more of these.

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That, ladies and gentleman, is my 6th Silver 7 which means I have lost…drum roll please…half a pound over 3 stone since November 1st 2011! I am beyond delighted and can’t quite believe it to be honest. I was talking to my leader today about goals, as I don’t know what to put my official goal weight down as. I initially thought 10st as it is bang in the middle of the healthy BMI range for my height (which I’m finally in by the way!) but from a financial point of view, if I put it as 10st 7lbs (or anything up to 10st 10lbs actually) I can be ‘at goal’ and continue to lose weight if I want but go to meetings for free. Now, we’re buying a house (fingers crossed) so every penny counts at the moment…but I think in my heart of hearts I’d feel like I was cheating. Also, if I get to 50lbs off (and I’m at 42.5 now) then I get a certificate…and I’m a sucker for a certificate…!

I think I’m going to stick with 10st and have the financial aspect as an incentive to work as hard as humanly possible at it. It’s taken me the last 5 weeks to lose 9lbs so if I can do the same (plus half a pound) I’ll be there by mid April…

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